An Ode to .. King Luxon

It Was a Very Good Year
The scribes and pamphleteers fill the Great Hall.
It is the afternoon of the Annual Press Conference
Of King Luxon the First.
The scribes scuffle amongst themselves
To get a good seat.
“O King, How do you feel your first year
On the Golden Throne has gone?”,
Inquires an eager scribe.
“What I would say to you,” answers the King,
“Is that my third sale this year recently returned
930,000 kopecks for a two-bedroom hovel,
Purchased for 620,500 kopecks in May 2015.”
“O Majesty,” waves a millennial scribe,
“How do you feel the serfs are finding it out there?”
“What I would say to you,” replies the King,
“Is that in September I offloaded another investment hovel,
Again for 930,000 kopecks, in the muddy hamlet of Onehunga.”
“O Great One,” quavers a nervous TVNZ scribe,
“What is the outlook for unemployed serfs?”
“What I would say to you,” advises the King,
“Is that I also hocked off the Kings Landing apartment
I bought in September 2020 for $795,000 for $975,000.”
Tax free,” adds the King with a wink,
“And just before I moved into
The newly renovated Premier Palace.”
“By the way,” says the King, warming to his task,
“I also own several other estates, including family castles
In Remuera and on Waiheke Island,
As well as extensive plains in the Principality of Botany.”
The King thinks for a minute.
“So in answer to your original question,
My first year as King has been an enormous success.”
A stunned silence has descended
Over the shabby rows of scribes
With their back breaking penury and brutal debt bondage.
Eventually a voice comes from the back.
“O King, but what about your subjects?”
There is an uncomprehending pause.
“But what about them, my good fellow?”
Replies the King,
with a blank and empty stare.